MORNING NEWS CRUISE

What you may have missed while pondering who J.K Rowling is gonna finish off. (this format 'borrowed' from other [read: better] bloggers)

• Burris Burns: As I called it, the Calgary Stampeders beat the Montreal Alouettes for their third straight victory. Coincidentally, the Alouettes lost their third in a row after starting the season 7-0. Henry Burris, Stamps starter, went 18-for-33, for 295 yards, while the Stamps racked up 523 total yards against the leagues second-best defense. In an otherwise boring year for the CFL, hopefully this game is the catalyst for more excitement.

• See me fly: Carolina Panthers rookie DeAngelo Williams returned a kick-off 98 yards for a touchdown, perhaps securing his spot as the starting kick-off / punt returner for the team. However, the first-team offense was horrendous: Steve Smith is still out, Jake Delhomme went 6-for-15 for a whopping 56 yards, and the team did not gain a first down until 3:33 left in second quarter. Despite this, they still won. Against Miami. Sounds about right.

• Seeing Red: Scoring thier final four-runs with two out, the Cincinnati Reds beat the San Franciso Giants last night. The big deal? The victory allowed the Reds to tie the Cardinals (who lost to the Mets) for first place in the NL Central. What's really sad about this is that the Reds and the Cardinals have a worse winning percentage (as do the Dodgers, the NL West division leaders) that the Toronto Blue Jays, who sit third in the AL East. Does anyone else think something's wrong with this picture?

• Love the 'Twin Stripes': The Minnesota Twins took two-of-three from the Baltimore Orioles (where's the SWEEP?!), including a 11-2 rout last night to keep pace with the AL wild card leaders, the Chicago White Sox. This confidence bodes well for the Twins upcoming (read: HUGE) series with the Chicago White Sox. Probably starters for the series: Friday: Radke (12-9) vs. Vazquez (11-8); Saturday: Santana (15-5) vs. Contreras (11-6); Sunday: Silva (8-11) vs. Buehrle (10-11). I am calling this one 2-outta-3 for the Twins, with Saturday's game being the one to watch (no brainer).

• Hometown Roots: Former agent/accused pedofile/assassination target/juicebar owner/gag-inducer David Frost is going on trial in September in my small hometown of Napanee. Ontario. He faces 12 charges of sexual exploitation and one assault charge from his involvement with the Quinte Hawks organization, based out of even smaller Deseronto, Ontario.

Not to worry though, I am having my mom bake a coconut cream pie to splash on his face. However, knowing the population of Quinte Detention Centre, Millhaven Penitentary (made famous by none other than the Tragically Hip), Jocyeville Penitentary, and the numerous Penitentaries in Kingston, a 'coconut' pie in the face is the least of Frost's worries. At least I hope so.

SIDE NOTE: The numerous "correctional facilities" in-and-around my hometown is neither a reflection of those town's or their inhabitants. Plain and simple, we need the money, jobs, and free-labour for our farms.

Enjoy the last weekend of summer. Labour Day doesn't count for me, because, I have to labour at work. Boo.